That Development Lady

robot-heart-politics:

gauntlet:

As a woman you can eschew or embrace femininity, but you will be rewarded and punished in equal amounts no matter which option you choose. You can never win.

If you’re a woman who only drinks wine and who loves to talk about clothes and needlepoint, men will view you with contempt for being a wimpy wussy girly girl. If you’re a woman who drinks beer and loves talking about sports, then –Wow! My type o’ woman, hur hur. But then, you better counteract that with a fabulous dress and killer nails. Because take it too far, cast off too much of the feminine, and uh oh. We’re in freak country now: Yeaaah, I’m pretty sure she’s a man-hatin’ dyke. Snicker, snicker (Funny how unfeminine women are often assumed to be man-haters, instead of femininity or women-haters … As if not being feminine = not pleasing men = instant man-hater).

And so it ends up being an endless negotiation and compromise and balancing act. Go right ahead and admit that you have a soft spot for 90s rom coms, but then you’d better dismiss romance novels and their readers as tacky and pathetic. Sure, swear like a trooper, but make sure it’s offset by a charming giggle. By all means be a gearhead and spend all your disposable income on car related crap, but you’d better learn how to make a ripper curry and reattach a wayward button (I mean, jeeze, won’t somebody think of the husbands?!)

Of course the only answer is to decide that you don’t give a fuck about what men think. That you don’t care about male approval anyway (and most feminists are probably already doing this somewhat. Hell, even admitting that you’re a feminist means forfeiting a significant amount of male approval right off the bat (fortunately it is the type of male approval I do not want, anyway)).

(via the 5th Carnival of Feminists)